May 2011
39 posts
May 31st
24 notes
I’ll be home soon, LA. In a few short hours I’ll be out front of the Rustic, wing sauce in my beard, calling my farts “the ol’ Santa Anas.”
May 30th
4 notes
RT @garbagetime: I hump girls like a young Forrest Gump learning to dance.
May 29th
May 29th
1,227 notes
RT @Corn_Palace: @kylekinane A hot dog castle would be sweeeeeeeet. But of course, we like corny things.
May 28th
1 note
Last thing I ate? Banana pepper with some pizza sauce on it. Write a rap song about that, lazy hipster wink-at-it fuckfaces. Learn the drums
May 26th
9 notes
RT @AcmeComedyCo: Kyle Kinane is here at Acme this week. Call and make your reservations today! 612-338-6393
May 25th
1 note
Having a milkshake right after a cheeseburger is like answering the question “What else can we do with cows?” that your stomach never asked.
May 24th
31 notes
May 24th
3 notes
May 24th
5 notes
Am I farting or deflating? Enough already.
May 24th
11 notes
May 23rd
60 notes
Just finished reading all of Twitter. Turns out it sucks and all I need to follow is @McRibSandwich and @LivingColour
May 23rd
5 notes
May 22nd
4 notes
Cats are like women: the less interested they are in me, the more obsessed I get with them.
May 22nd
23 notes
Forever from the top rope now, Macho Man. Rest in Peace, Randy Savage.
May 21st
11 notes
May 20th
2,190 notes
White Castle’s in the furnace after beers and an absolutely great show at the Firebird. Thank you, St. Louis. Bloomington, see you tmrw.
May 20th
1 note
May 20th
9 notes
The Daily Flailure: The Rapture for Dummies →
flailure: There are many misconceptions about the upcoming Rapture, but here are the facts. May 21, 2011 is the Rapture. That does not mean that Saturday is the end of the world. The Rapture is, in fact, a precursor to the end of the world. On Saturday, only the 3 million true believers will be saved. The…
May 20th
60 notes
May 20th
421 notes
May 20th
10 notes
Gonna pregame for tonight’s STL show @DadBoner style with some wings and cold ones at Hooters, conveniently located next to my Red Roof Inn.
May 19th
2 notes
May 19th
50 notes
The day cheeseburgers grow on trees is the day I order a salad from McDonalds.
May 17th
10 notes
Installing a balloon drop over my bed, GALS. http://t.co/prJqUQO
May 16th
1 note
RT @grahamelwood: @Apey @kylekinane @andytwood and I all getting our Purple boners ready for Prince! http://t.co/yiWfbEL
May 15th
1 note
May 14th
64 notes
RT @Apey: “I would definitely patronize a Red Lobster hotel & casino if they opened one.” — @kylekinane, man of refined taste.
May 14th
3 notes
RT @FlappersComedy: Join us @FlappersComedy for @jimmydorecomedy Submersive Comedy tonight at 8pm for @kylekinane, @brendonwalsh, Karen …
May 13th
2 notes
I have no idea why, but Al B. Sure’s headshot behind the counter of this carwash just made me change my mind about getting an ice cream.
May 12th
10 notes
I’ve got a 55” TV with a million channels but putting a paper towel tube in my butthole and sharpshooter farting is still more entertaining.
May 10th
6 notes
The Comedy Bureau: The Bridgetown Tapes: An... →
thecomedybureau: While at the Bridgetown Comedy Festival in Portland, Bureau Director Jake Kroeger got to catch a word with some of the most talked about comedians at the festival. Here, Kyle Kinane had just won another year of Nato Green’s comedy take on Iron Chef, “Iron Comic”, in which comedians write…
May 10th
23 notes
Did I watch Treme or the most over-produced Budweiser commercial I’ve ever seen?
May 9th
7 notes
Relapse Theater at 1am. Let’s close out this trip with all the wrong moves, Atlanta.
May 8th
1 note
Turns out I put my wallet in the minifridge last night. Go figure.
May 4th
14 notes
Star Bar Atlanta tonight. Make my poison oak sickness worth it. Also, handsome young @karlhess is here too.
May 4th
Looks like these two large pizzas I planned on eating will have more historical significance than I thought.
May 2nd
59 notes
“Nabbing some serious crustos out of the tube, bro.” Surf talk for picking my nose.
May 1st
9 notes