Had the fajitas…ALONE. Your loss, Milwaukee. Bloomington, Indiana, I’m feeling vulnerable and I’m all yours this weekend (Comedy Attic)
Oh, and sorry—there wasn’t a MPLS show. Just passin’ through, did the open mic at House of Comedy.
Attn sexy single ladies of the Milwaukee Int’l Airport, I’ve taken the liberty of ordering you the nachos at the Chilis Too, concourse C.
At the Mall of America. Just saw a store that sells swords and vases. Personal patriotism is at an all-time high.
“Are you still upset about the chocolate Jesus dicks?” Spencer Dobson, saying the best sentence I’ve ever heard in comedy.
Ticket holders for tonight’s Grand Forks show get buy 1 get 1 free at the Crosstown Lounge after. Come booze with me.
TLC just blurred out nude paintings on LA Ink, but the next program SHOWS a woman having an orgasm during childbirth. Burn it all down.
The Learning Channel just blurred out the penis on DaVinci’s Vitruvian Man. Time to pack up shop, society. This shit’s over.
Much like Jesus with the fish, it’s miraculous how many farts I’ve created from eating just one cookie for dinner last night. Hallelujah.
The Winnipeg Diaries, vol. 5
The ladybugs have returned in full force. They are everywhere. I’d take action, but this place is more their home than it is mine. The other night, while walking home from the bar, I saw into the open window of a garden apartment on Grant Street. There was a guy walking around with a key-tar (a keyboard you wear like a guitar.) It was 2am. All I could think was, “That man is making...
Empire Arts Center in Grand Forks Sunday 9pm w/ my pal Spencer Dobson, then MPLS as a tourist for a couple days. Triple Rock, anyone?
I fell asleep. Did I miss anything? Oh, pizza!
To answer the fans, “Pick A Puppy” is on CMT and I had Boston Pizza for dinner. It was terrible. I ate half of it.
My favorite part of “Hoarders” is when the person says “Don’t throw that out—maybe someone can make a craft project out of it.” Classic!
Airedale Terrier that these dumb sluts named after a Toby Keith song, fyi.
Pizza’s here! Pick a goddamn puppy already!
I ordered a pizza, got mad about ordering it, forgot ordering it, then got real happy when I remembered I ordered that pizza. #Winnipeg
Watching a show called “Pick A Puppy.” People come on the show, check out some puppies, then pick one. Blowing my fucking mind right now.
Congratulations my San Franciscan friends.